Day 30 - L.I.FE: Anatomy of a Group

I've been lucky enough to have been a part of two groups in my life till date. By groups I don't mean music bands or hobby / activity groups or any such sort, I mean group of friends.

You will notice in your life that usually its a friend circle or group of friends that you are a part of. This is true when you are in school, college or work life. A few common people come together and sub consciously form a group that seems to start 'hanging out' together. Soon this group becomes something that you look forward to. This is different from my post on 'Family but not Family' of a few days back.

So as I said, I've been lucky enough to be a part of at least two groups that are very close to my heart. In fact that 'group of friends' still exists though in one instance we may be thousands of miles apart.

As I think about my group of friends, I realise that every group seems to have a set pattern and you can actually classify people in the group into certain brackets or types. These are, of course, my thoughts and you may have differ from them. But by and large people / friends in a group can be classified into L.I.FE - not withstanding the fact that a group does need life to make it!

Late Latif: This is the person who is perennially late to any meeting. You tell the person that we will meet at 2:00pm and you will realise that while all the others are there, this person will be having a bath in their house at 1:45 and will say that they will be there by 2. Usually they land up for the meeting by 2:30. Over a period of time you start accounting for their delay and adjust your meeting time accordingly. If you have to meet at 3, you tell everyone 2:30 knowing that all others will account for the delay and surprisingly will land up by 3. Of course, the flip side is that the punctual person will land up always on time and have to wait for the Late Latif!

The fun is that we love them for that and have a good laugh everytime we meet.

Intermittent: These are the people in the group about whom you are never sure. Are they a part of the group or are they just there for some time? These people seem to come in and go out of the group from time to time. To the other members it seems as if this person is not 'dedicated' to the group. While the rest of the gang will try to ensure that the group stays alive, you feel as if it doesn't make much difference to the 'Intermittent' person if the group survives or not. They will just drift from one group to the next.

The truth may be that these people are afraid to show their emotions but feel as stringly about the group as the next person.

Fun loving & Energetic: Now these are the core of the group. These are the people for whom it is imperitive that the group survive and they will try anything to ensure that the group meets and has fun. These are usually the people in the group who will send emails, make calls and keep in touch with everyone else. They enthuse a lot of energy into the group and make it fun to meet. They will get the others to decide on the venue, time and date so that the group meets. They will try to keep a balance in the group and make sure that everyone is talking to each other. They show empathy with others and try to bring out the issues and solve them. I would call them the 'bamboo' that holds the 'tamboo' in place.

But for any group to form you need all sorts of people. If everyone is the same, the group will not form.

I believe that L.I.FE form a group.

I can identify the L.I.FE members in my groups. Can you in yours?